Tethered

 On the very first day of my LDS mission, my trainer thought it would be splendid to go tracting. Which is the classic door-to-door confrontation/sales pitch of religion that is so classicly associated with Mormonism and also largely done away within missions. But nevertheless, for some reason, we did it.  So there I was, knowing I had what most people consider a full workday worth of knocking on doors, in a new place, amongst strangers, getting yelled at and doors slammed in my face. Oh, what fun.  After several hours it was time to break for dinner. We always had dinner with members of the ward in which we served. Knocking on yet another door, I braced myself for the discomfort of again being amongst strangers.  But that feeling never came. I walked into a familiar-feeling home. Pictures and decor my own mother had hung and more importantly, they knew exactly who I was and what I was doing. Though I had never met this family, they didn't feel like strangers. I felt...

I'm watching my children play, sipping my coffee - yes, coffee, light is pouring into our living room and snow is quietly falling outside. I'm a little nervous... But on the surface, I feel calm and ready to drop bombs. Had to. ;) Now is as good a time as any, I decided literally 10 minutes ago, to word vomit my thoughts in a potentially more public space. The past year or so has been a whirlwind, and having a baby in the middle of it made me put so many decisions on the backburner. I'm just now having the time and mental clarity to face them.  My husband and I have decided to step away from the religion we have lived and loved our entire lives. The purpose of me writing this isn't to get into the specific reasons - there are a lot. It's emotional, polarizing, and honestly doesn't make me feel great to talk about. And you, dear reader, probably could give a shit. Maybe another time.  The decision to leave already happened, and now I'm more focused on the imp...